Substance Abuse and Addiction

What Is Addiction: An obsessive-compulsive craving to achieve a temporary euphoric feeling through the compulsive chasing of an object of desire. Thoughts become obsessed, preoccupied, with experiencing the next high and the addictive behaviors becomes out of control. The mind says: “I want what I want and I want it NOW.” The addict will lie, steal and hurt people in order to achieve the object of desire. Any negative

consequences as a result of the addictive behavior are no deterrent. Full steam ahead and damn the torpedoes.

 Some common addictions include: alcohol and drugs, food, love and sex, gambling, shopping, feelings of power or self-importance, work and money, a thrilling experience, smartphones and the internet.

 Causes of Addictive Behavior: The fundamental cause of addictions is an insatiable desire to feel pleasure, to feel   in control, to feel complete, to relax. This is driven by an emotional feeling of emptiness inside. This feeling of emptiness can be a lack of self-worth, a fear of not receiving enough loving attention, and/or a restlessness that cannot be soothed.  Addiction is often described with an image of a “hungry ghost.” A hungry ghost is a skin and bones figure with a huge stomach and a small mouth. No matter how much the hungry ghost consumes, they remain hungry for more and more. They are never satisfied but continue to crave the addictive object of desire. 

Addictions may begin as a way to avoid and escape from an unpleasant feeling, or stressful situation. Feelings of anger, sadness and loss, social anxiety, work and relationship stress, insecurity, boredom and loneliness are common triggers for starting an addictive pattern of escape and avoidance. It is very wise to get therapeutic support to learn and practice healthy emotional regulation and interpersonal skills for these common situations.

 Consequences: Addictive behavior creates a vicious cycle of experiencing the high feeling, a short recovery that soon produces a strong preoccupation in the mind to get the high again, and a craving need that says, “I have to have more.”

Gradually, more and more of the substance, experience, relationship or object is needed in order not to feel the unpleasant feelings after coming down. This cycle produces feelings of shame, deep insecurity, loss of control, a strong disconnection from others, isolation, impatience, irritability, anger and fear. The person needs to engage more often in the addiction to escape these negative emotions that are a natural consequence of the addictive cycle.

 The addictive behavior, and the temporary high it produces, becomes ones best friend, ie, the highest priority in their life (so to speak). The addict lacks empathy for others and becomes very self-centered and Narcissistic. Partners of addicts feel alone, abandoned, angry and feel powerless to control or help the addict. The addict is lost in their own self-absorbed world of craving to feel good.    

 Recovery Therapy: A recovery support system with people who are experiencing the same addiction and are wanting to interrupt and stop the cycle is very important.

This most effective support system includes a professional therapist who has been trained in addiction recovery. I have worked with many people in recovery to:

 ….Understand the addictive cycle and it’s consequences

….Experience inner presence to integrate

….Support the person to engage in recovery support

….Learn environmental planning to avoid triggers

….Learn impulse control skills and practices

….Learn and practice-self soothing and distress tolerance

….Learn and practice positive interpersonal skills